My Path: Awakening

So when I left off, we had just met Jewel and Jack, and my first real introduction into metaphysics and magic.

Jewel said she could see auras. So did Jack. They said they could do magic. They had a few friends that said the same.

I wanted to impress Jewel. I figured learning this stuff would be a good way to do it. (Note from the editor: getting into something to get a girl to like you does not work.)

I practiced being able to see auras. I had little success. I practiced astral projection. I had little success. I practiced seeing and talking to spirits. I had little success.

I may have pretended to have more success than I did. I was young.

Jack employed an interesting magical system. He claimed to have learned it at a very young age by being instructed by the spirits themselves. I accepted the notion that mighty dragon spirits would approach a small child in his dreams and teach him to wield awesome power very uncritically. Because on the surface, it seemed like a bunch of bullshit. But there were times where I was able to see auras. And when I did see shapes where they said there were spirits. Oh, and when I had dreams where I talked to the spirits and Jewel knew about it. And when I practiced astral projection and Jack knew I had visited.

The energy work was the most interesting part. Jack’s magical system had nine elements. I found that not only could I identify energy “balls” Jack generated by element, but that when I focused on an element and sent a concentrated ball of energy back to him, he could identity what element I had intended to send.

I started sensing spirits and seeing dragons. It’s one thing to imagine an event like that, but when I sensed a presence (and didn’t mention it) and Jack or Jewel commented that a spirit was nearby, it really deepened my belief that something really was going on here.

Jack stopped selling drugs. He had an OD experience one night, and it kind of changed him a bit. He claimed that when he went under, the spirits brought him to the underworld and tested him. He doesn’t talk much about it, but apparently he passed.

Jewel and I had sort of a parting of ways. As teen girls do, she shifted her attentions elsewhere. And I ended up sleeping with one of her friends. As aloof as she had been in taking up with someone else herself, she was awfully pissed off. After a while we formed a bit of a truce, which developed into a rather pathetic situation in which I pathetically pined after her for several pathetic years, and she took full advantage of my pathetic-ness to get whatever she could out of me. But that’s another story, and I probably won’t tell it.

But Jack and I were fast friends. And since his Testing, he felt he had earned a kind of “mastery.” (Beware those who claim this term too easily!) So he took it upon himself to teach me the full scope of his art of magic, which he called Whytar.

We engaged in a series of interesting and sometimes useless exercises. We often hiked into parks or obscure wooded areas, or into river beds or sand bars, and the occasional cave. These occurred both night and day. We would do energy work, practice astral travel, enter trance states, and work with combat magic and defense. We communed with the spirits, and we discussed theory and cosmology. And we worked on decoding the Octogram.

oct

Axis Mundi

The way things flowed together from one point to the next made sense. We developed ways to use what we uncovered in ritual work and free-form magic. And we started applying some of it. And we got some results.

There were some complications, though. Jack was not operating alone. He had a group that he worked with. That he was the leader of, I suppose. They were all familiar with his magical system to some degree, although I was the only one who had moved into the inner circle and worked most intimately with Jack. But there was a problem with this group.

Who remembers in my last post where I said that Jack liked LSD?

I had found a group of people who introduced me to a world beyond our own. A world of spirits that I could contact. A world of energy I could sense and manipulate. A world of magic. I had learned to develop a power I had never imagined.

I had fallen in with a bunch of kids on psychedelic drugs who thought that they were destined to destroy the world and rebuild it in an enlightened and more balanced state. And because of the affirming experiences I had been through, and the power I craved, and my need to belong, I decided I would help them.

Yeah, there was some error of judgement on my early magical path.

 

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7 responses to “My Path: Awakening

  1. Pingback: My Path: Early Groups | Blacklight Metaphysics

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